Yep, Another Op-Ed on the Ladies Event

I know, I know. Everyone and their mom have written about their opinion on the Ladies Event. It’s been debated on blogs and even Twitter (how anyone would want to try and debate something in 140 characters or less is beyond me), but I just wanted to give my two cents in my own little space… but then I read Dr. Pauly’s post on his Tao of Poker website, and I was like OMG I TOTALLY AGREE!!

So read that first… http://taopoker.blogspot.com/2010/06/2010-wsop-day-15-dude-looks-like-lady.html

What he says about the debate on the ladies event stemming from more deep-rooted issues is true too, so all this debate may not make a difference, but oh well, here’s what I think.

Well,  I’ve always been sort of a neo-feminist… I played every sport growing up, dressed in windbreaker pants and a UofM tee-shirt to my sixth-grade Valentine’s Day dance (after which I was promptly dumped), and my favorite commercials growing up were part of the Mia Hamm/Michael Jordan “Anything you can do I can do better” series.

I’ve since grown up, and instead of thinking that women are better than men, I see us as equals (but I won’t be pissed at my Fiance for opening doors and buying me flowers). No more girls rule, boys drool.

As far as poker goes, it’s clear that women can compete on equal footing with men. Obviously, no sex has more of an edge. However, the way in which each sex has historically been welcomed to the game is vastly different. Because of societal norms and past rhetoric of poker being a man’s game, women have been shy and often feel discouraged to play. Not that it’s right, not that women aren’t strong enough to say “EF you I’m playing,” and not that it is still the same way today, but it’s true that SOME women feel more comfortable playing with other women. So like Pauly says, LET THEM DO IT THEN!

There are lots of arguments out there against having women’s only tournaments, and I find it fairly easy to find flaws in them.

Argument: The absence of a ladies event would legitimize women in poker

I actually think that the push for abolishing ladies events in order to legitimize women in poker is more sexist than the existence of ladies only events in itself. Why do we need to take away an option that women have? Ladies only events aren’t saying “We can’t play with men, we need this tournament.” It’s saying “I’d prefer to play with other women.”

Taking away this option won’t legitimize women in poker! Women are doing that by themselves! Jennifer Harman commands more respect than almost any man in poker and is an equal to her fellow Big Game peers. Liv Boeree just trampled over 1,000 people in San Remo. Annette Obrestad consistently runs over her competition and has even done so once without looking at her cards.

So to even say that women NEED legitimizing is sexist!! We don’t need legitimizing… we just need MORE OF US. Can it actually be argued that women’s only tournaments don’t bring in new players?

Argument: You’re enabling women to stay in their comfort zones

Well, you’ve said it yourself… There is a comfort aspect for some women to play ladies only events which therefore reinforces the need for tournaments like this in the first place! No one needs someone making decisions for them to say, “Hey, step up and play with the big boys. Get out of your comfort zone.”

Argument: Women would just play open events if there were no ladies event

I think many men are under the misunderstanding that women can always feel just as comfortable at table full of men as they can at a table full of women. Now, I play poker all time, and take it quite seriously. I play cash all the time and with mostly men. Women are such a rare occurrence at the table, so when we’re there, I think it’s safe to say, we get pretty consistent annoying remarks like:

“Whoaaa watch out, it’s a lady!” — wow, thanks for announcing that. Now everyone is looking at me. ME = uncomfortable

“I can’t play against women! I can’t read them.” (laughing while smirking to the other guys) — ugh really? Lots of men use this a slightly condescending defense mechanism when they lose a pot to a woman. Come on, you know what I’m talking about guys. ME = annoyed

“Come on honey, smile once.” — No, I don’t feel like smiling! Should I be smiling because I’m a girl? Are you going to tell the 200 pound dude next to you to smile? NO. ME = feeling less like smiling (ok, that one’s border line, but still!)

“I’m hitting on you” — obviously they don’t say that, they just do it. It’s happened to me, and it happens to other women at the table all the time. I’ve seen countless women made to feel uncomfortable by men throwing huge whiffs at the table which always = AWKWAAARD!!!

There’s also lots of talk about “hot chicks, bangin this, bangin that blahblah. SOOO BIG WHOOPDYDOOO if I’d like to play in a tournament with women and not deal with that STUFFFFF. DAAAAAAAAAAAAAANG. Of course it would be sexist to say that all men are like that. I’m not saying that at all. Almost all of my friends are males who play poker (haha that kind of sounds like the joke about the racist white guy who says, “I’m not racist, I have a black friend.) but seriously, stuff like I described happens A LOT.

Argument: Men feel discriminated against

Ummm just read the paragraphs before this. DO THOSE THINGS HAPPEN TO YOU??? Do other men look at your boobies because they are the only ones in the room? No. When that happens to you, then you can have your own men’s tournament.

Now, to the men who played in the event… It’s ok. I know this is kind of weird after everything I just said, but honestly, I’m not mad at them at all because I do understand a few of their reasons. Shaun Deeb is one of the sweetest, most down to earth poker players I’ve met. He lost a bet which forced him to play and he truly believes that women don’t “need” this event because they can, should, and could be successful in open events. He also said he’d donate all the money to charity. Those are all very sweet, noble, and great thoughts. Unfortunately though, his presence or any other male presence in the field isn’t going to make women who prefer playing with other women say, “Man, you’re right. I don’t need this, I’m going to play with a bunch of men like you guys who don’t respect my choice to play in a WOMEN’S ONLY event!”

Sarcasm aside, I really understand what Shaun was trying to say, but I think his actions aren’t going to get him the result he wants which is more women in poker.

I also even understand the men who played because of the equity. I used to be an equity monger too. Andrew and I used to crash a game at the Navy Club in Fort Wayne. It was meant to be a place where Veterans could play poker once a week with their friends, but they couldn’t deny us membership because of the Law, so their game was infiltrated by young, money hungry, aggressive kids. Looking back though, that’s not who I want to be. I don’t want to disrespect people. I don’t want my legacy to be that I’d check-raise my grandma for money. It’s just not right. Hmmm I’m not arguing this point very well, but it’s just how I feel.

Shweeuu…

OH, but the guy who used a tampon as a card protect!…  Yeah, he’s just an idiotic brain infected nose pickin butt lickin stink face!! (my favorite insult from elementary school)

Wow, I thought this was going to be short, but it didn’t turn out that way. I hope people aren’t going to hate me for this post, but my last blog post has a girl shoving her voluptuous booty into a man’s face (whoot girl/vagjayjay power) haha so I thought, hey, what have I got to lose?

OHHHHH I almost forgot to add that I PLAYED in the ladies event. First, let me be clear, I rarely play tournaments, but have a couple cashes on my Hendon Mob (in open events). I actually really don’t like playing tournaments, and would rather spend my off work time in cash games. But, I wanted to play at least one WSOP event this year and decided to play the women’s event because I think it’s FUN! SO SUE ME!! Haha I played 20 minutes though. I got all in on the turn with A-10 against K-10 on a Q-10-10-2 board. King on the river and I adios-ed.

To those of you who had a piece of me, thank you! Andrew, Scott, Donnie, Duane, Mandy, Marc and Spencer. Sorry I couldn’t do better for us.

Love you gosh-darn effers, PEACE- KRIS